Why Some People Prefer Not to Smile (And What to Do)
Many people don’t realize that there are various health reasons why someone might feel uncomfortable showing their teeth when they smile. As I got older, I found myself becoming one of those people—even though I’m naturally happy and love to smile and laugh.
Smiling is actually good for you! It triggers the release of happy hormones in your brain, boosting your mood and overall well-being. That’s why we should do it as often as possible.
However, there are times—especially as we age—when smiling doesn’t come as easily.
In this article, I’ll share my personal experiences, explore some common reasons why some people prefer not to smile, and offer ways to overcome them. My hope is that this will help you embrace a healthier, happier version of yourself (if that’s what you’d like to do:)
Why Some People Prefer Not to Smile (And How to Overcome It)
While some people prefer not to smile, there are ways to overcome most of the issues. However, it should be up to the people with the problem to determine if they want to make a change.
You should never point out that someone does not smile. It could be very hurtful or embarrassing.
Below you will find lots of information that will help you understand this issue better.
Stress Can Cause People Not to Smile
Modern life can be incredibly stressful, and stress and smiling don’t often go hand in hand. Fortunately, there are ways to manage stress so you can feel more relaxed and happier.
One of the best ways to combat stress is through physical activity. Whether it’s dancing, running, lifting weights, or any other form of movement that gets your heart rate up, exercise can work wonders for your mood.
The benefits of exercise go beyond just fitness—it helps release endorphins (your body’s natural “happy hormones”) and oxygenates your blood, both of which contribute to a more positive state of mind.
When you take steps to reduce stress, chances are your smile will return naturally.
Your Inner Critic May be Causing the Problem
Most of us have an inner critic that seems to speak up at the worst possible moments. The problem is, it’s all too easy to listen to that voice and let it hold us back from doing what we truly value—ultimately affecting our confidence and happiness.
One powerful way to silence your inner critic is to let it chatter away while choosing to take action anyway. By doing what matters to you despite the negativity, you prove to yourself that those thoughts have no real power over your life. Over time, this can help quiet that inner voice and free you to live more fully.
Another helpful approach is to remind yourself that just because your inner critic is loud doesn’t mean it’s telling the truth. Surrounding yourself with uplifting words—like self-love poems and quotes—can reinforce positive thinking and drown out self-doubt.
Positive affirmations are another great tool for shifting your mindset. When practiced consistently, they can help reframe negative thoughts and build self-confidence, making it easier to embrace your worth and move forward with courage.
Issues with Your Teeth
Sometimes, we can be as happy as possible, but physical issues with our smiles cause the problems. After all, it can be hard to beam with joy if we have a missing tooth.
I know from experience. I lost a tooth on my left side and could not get an implant due to sinus infections. I was constantly self-conscious about smiling because of that single missing tooth.
Later in my life, my teeth began to turn gray. This made it even more difficult to smile, especially when I was posting on social media. People often posted rude comments about my teeth.
I learned that my mother had taken tetracycline when she was pregnant with me, and I was given the same medicine when I had extremely high fevers as a toddler. This was 50+ years ago!
Over time, scientists learned that tetracycline caused a problem when teeth were forming in the uterus. It also caused a problem when adult teeth were forming after birth. There was absolutely NOTHING that could be done to whiten teeth that were discolored from the inside-out.
Fortunately, lost teeth are typically an issue with an easy fix today. Generally, dental implants are a long-lasting solution. Plus, they are becoming less expensive than they were when I lost my tooth.
They not only improve the aesthetics of the smile but restore the chewing function and promote overall dental health by fighting things like bone loss.
Additionally, there is a relatively new technology called Digital Smile Design that can replace your discolored and missing teeth in just 2-3 appointments! My dentist became a certified provider around the same time I was trying to decide what to do about my discolored teeth. I was thrilled!
With these things in mind, today it’s easier than ever to fix a smile that is holding you back.
Physical or Mental Health Issues
Smiling can feel impossible when just getting out of bed—let alone making it through the day—feels like a challenge. Exhaustion has a way of wearing down even the happiest of us over time.
The tricky thing about exhaustion is that it can stem from many different causes. That’s why your first step should be a visit to your doctor to rule out any underlying health issues, such as anemia or other physical conditions.
A person who does not smile may also have physical face pain when they smile. Something like teeth grinding at night can cause jaws and cheeks to be very painful. It can also cause major headaches and sleep disturbances. These folks should see their dentist to discuss solutions.
Mental health struggles, like depression, can also lead to persistent exhaustion. If you suspect this might be a factor, getting screened can help you access the support and treatment you need.
A lack of confidence may also cause someone not to smile. If they feel uncomfortable in a particular setting, or just lack overall confidence, it could be difficult to smile. This can be addressed with mental health therapy if it becomes a problem.
If both physical and mental health concerns have been ruled out, consider taking a closer look at your diet, activity levels, and sleep habits. Small adjustments in these areas can often make a big difference in restoring your energy and helping you feel more like yourself again.
Comparing Yourself to Others
Comparison can be a major reason we hesitate to smile—especially in the age of social media. After all, comparison is practically built into modern life.
Social media, in particular, encourages us to measure our everyday reality against everyone else’s highlight reel. It’s no wonder we sometimes feel like we—and our lives—are falling short.
The good news? There’s a simple yet powerful way to break free from constant comparison: gratitude. Practicing gratitude helps shift our focus to the abundance in our own lives rather than what we think we’re missing.
A great way to start is by taking just 60 seconds each day to list three things you’re grateful for. It doesn’t matter whether anyone else has them—what matters is that you do.
Then, the next time you catch yourself comparing your life to someone else’s, pause and remind yourself of those three things. By doing this, you can shift your mindset and embrace your own unique journey.
Never Criticize Someone Who Does Not Smile
It’s important to remember that not everyone who refrains from smiling is unhappy or unfriendly. There are countless personal, emotional, and even medical reasons why someone might not smile as often as others.
Judging or criticizing them for it can be not only unfair but also deeply hurtful. Many people struggle with insecurities, dental issues, chronic pain, mental health challenges, or simply a natural resting expression that doesn’t include a constant smile. This is often referred to as Resting Bitch Face (RBF).
Assuming the worst about someone based on their lack of a smile can add unnecessary pressure and reinforce feelings of self-consciousness.
Instead of criticizing, practicing kindness and understanding can go a long way.
A person’s worth isn’t measured by how often they smile, and expecting others to perform happiness on demand can be dismissive of their personal experiences.
Everyone has their own journey, and sometimes, offering a little empathy and encouragement—rather than judgment—can make all the difference.
Rather than saying, “You should smile more,” try offering a genuine compliment or a moment of connection. A little kindness can do far more to brighten someone’s day than a demand for a smile ever could.
Final Thoughts
I hope you’ve developed a clearer understanding about why some people prefer not to smile, and how they can overcome the issue if they want to.
But I also hope you will be kind and compassionate to those who are unable to smile more.
Thank you for being here! I appreciate you!
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Love to ALL! ~ Susan
